Monthly Archives: July 2015

Reality Check



Recently a few people have said, “I don’t know how you do it every day!”

Truth be told, I don’t do it every day.

The “it” they are referring to is the schedule I (attempt) to keep.

Yes, I love block scheduling, planners, to-do lists, task apps, visual reminders, ……

I schedule out the homework I am going to do; the chores that need to get done; the tasks I need to do for Christian Military Wives Fellowship; the things I’d like to get done for the “Lici Joy Project”; the things I should be getting done for Stonecroft Military Ministry; I even schedule time to spend with my husband.

But…..that doesn’t mean I am able to stick to my schedule.

Reality is…..I have had two brain surgeries, have had my head banged/smashed/knocked too many times to count, my spinal cord was at one time attached to my bone and was bent out of shape, for my entire life I have had (and will have) a chiari malformation, my spinal fluid levels are sometimes a bit wonky, my neurological system goes on the fritz if I get tired, I fall over quite frequently, my husband often has to help me up the stairs (or I crawl up them, or I crawl as he helps me), some days I can’t even take my clothes off to go to bed, I forget to brush my teeth if I don’t have the toothpaste sitting on the counter (and then I still forget), I can take two steps and forget what I was going to do, I say things and have no recollection of saying them, or do things and have no recollection of doing them, I stutter when I’m tired, I often feel like I can’t put together a coherent thought, I constantly have headaches (all sorts….sometime ask me to describe them and you may be surprised at the ways I have found to differentiate them), and the only thing that gets me out of bed in the morning is the need to let the fur-babies out of their kennel.

Yesterday I got the toothpaste out and put it on the counter.

Then, I brushed my hair and put it up into some sort of messy top-knot.

By the time I was done with that I thought of something I needed to do and forgot to brush my teeth.

When I went to bed I realized the toothpaste was still sitting on the counter….an obvious sign that I forgot to do something.

So yes, I LOVE to-do lists, visual reminders, planners, task apps, and lots of sleep.

Yes, most days I cannot leave the house because that will take all my energy. (No, I am not a shut-in….at least I try to make it to Bible study and Chapel 😉

Yes, I love visitors!

Yes, I have a long list of things I want to accomplish…..

But, I have learned that I cannot accomplish everything on my list(s).

And that is okay.

I do my best and let God take care of the rest.

A good reminder that helps me not feel guilty that I can’t “do it all” comes from Colossians 3:17, “And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.”

Why is that an encouragement?

Because….it reminds me that I can do it ALL in His name (even if that means I’m resting on the couch listening to Scripture because I’m too exhausted to sit up and read)…..I can give thanks in ALL things (even if that is when I’m crawling up the stairs to go to bed… least I have stairs in a house in a nice place and a bed to crawl into and a husband who loves me and a God who accepts me even though my body is failing.)

Reality check….I can’t do it all, don’t do it all and am thankful for the days that I remember to brush my teeth 🙂

Be encouraged, for God is an awesome God and worthy to be praised!

~Lici Joy, the coffee-guzzling-truth-telling-joy-finding-polka-dot-fanatic

Two Questions….


For my second official post I have two questions……

Two questions for every Christian wife to ask every day….

One, Do I love God with all of my heart?

Two, Do I love my husband (and others) as myself?

Why those two questions?


When the Pharisees asked Jesus the following question, “Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?” ….Jesus said to them, “You shall love the Lord your God will all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.” (Matthew 23:34-40, ESV, paraphrased.)

If Jesus considered those the two greatest commandments….i.e. rules for us to live by…..then we should make certain that we live by them.

So, Are you loving God with all of your heart?

And, Are you loving your husband (and others) as yourself?

I hope I am!

Be encouraged, for you are loved with an incomparable love!

~Lici Joy, the coffee-guzzling-truth-telling-joy-finding-polka-dot-fanatic

My handsome hubby and I on our first date.

My handsome hubby and I on our first date.


Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.

Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. 2 Corinthians 3:17, ESV

It’s July 4th, 2015 and I am finally sitting down to write my first official blog post for the “Lici Joy Project.” Maybe after many more cups of coffee I’ll attempt to sit here and explain exactly what the “Lici Joy Project” is and why I made that the title of my blog. Alas, I have only had two bowls of coffee and deep thinking is alluding me today, so until I explain the “Lici Joy Project” you’ll just have to use your imagination, eh.

Today, our nation is celebrating its independence. Each year we celebrate the freedom that was hard won through battle. It is a day of great celebration, of remembering those who have fought and died for us, of eating things that seem patriotic (I’m thinking trays of fruit made to look like the American flag…which sound really yummy right now), a day of fireworks, and a day of being proud of the country we call home.

It occurs to me that as I celebrate being a proud member of the United States, the freedom I should celebrate every day is an even harder fought for and won freedom.

And with that, welcome to my cozy corner where I drink coffee and have a conversation with the unseen blog readers….whoever and wherever you are. Go get a cup of coffee and join me.

You might ask, “What freedom is it that you speak of? What freedom is harder fought and won than our nation’s independence?”

And I might respond…..after two bowls of coffee….

I speak of the freedom of my soul that was hard fought for and won by my Savior, Jesus Christ.

I don’t know about you, but my life has not been easy. It has been plagued with loneliness, depression, trauma, heartbreak, bitterness, an unforgiving spirit, disability, addiction of sorts, and even suicidal ideation.

For the longest time I lived in my own self-imposed prison. It was a prison made up of bars of “I was’s”.

I was the victim. I was the one who had a right to be angry. I was the one who did not need to forgive because those who hurt me didn’t seek forgiveness. I was the one who was badly created. I was the one who was suffering. I was the one who could see no point in living this miserable existence they call my life.


I found that there was freedom.

There was freedom in knowing that God made me a conqueror.

There was freedom in seeking peace.

There was freedom in forgiving….even when those who needed to be forgiven had not sought forgiveness.

There was freedom in knowing that God created me just the way I am for His divine purpose.

There was freedom in knowing that Christ, who being in very nature God . . . “did not consider equality with God as something to be grasped, but instead emptied Himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross!” (Philippians 2:6-8).

Then you could ask, “How does knowing Christ died on a cross give you freedom?”

I could then answer, …..

I know I am not  enough, nor will I ever be enough. I know that I am guilty of all sorts of things. I know that on my own, there is nothing good in or about me. I know that on my own I do not have to strength to forgive. I know that without the peace that comes only from having the Spirit of God alive and active in me I am a frantic-anxious-overburdened-addicted-to-the-things-of-this-world-angry-bitter-depressed-suicidal-sinful-disaster-not-worthy-of-love.

Yep, without the knowledge that Christ died for me; went to hell to bear the burden of my sins; that He took my punishment; that He chose to do this of His own free will; that He conquered the grave; that He rose again; that He sent the Holy Spirit to live in me; that the Holy Spirit has made me His temple; that I am chosen by Him; that I am completely forgiven; that I am free from the eternal consequences of my poor decisions; that I am a child of God; that I am holy and dearly loved; that God has a plan and purpose for my life; that I am a citizen of heaven; that I am FREE because of His sacrifice!….without that knowledge I might as well be dead. (Lots and lots of Scripture references…..)

I am FREE because He set me FREE.

I am FREE because He sent His Spirit to live in me.

I am FREE! (Romans 8:2)


So today, as I celebrate being a citizen of a free country, I also celebrate the freedom that comes from being a citizen of the greatest family that ever was or will be….I am a citizen of His family!

Be encouraged, for there is freedom to be found in Christ!

Lici Joy, The Coffee-Guzzling-Truth-Telling-Joy-Finding-Polka-Dot-Fanatic